Macho Fan Pillows

'He's a big softie really'.

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Important Muscles.

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Sylvester Stallone

Soldiers' Ego

Alpha males through the ages!

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

"This is all my own hair."

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"One last question, Berlinger. Is it just you, or is the whole damn Accounting Department shot full of steroids?"

Man with many tattoos.

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

"Come on. One more. You got it..." "It's so cute when they do that."

"Take no notice of George - it's just because he opened a jam jar earlier!"

'That rig has made me feel more like a man than any woman ever did.'

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

Arm and leg wrestling.

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

Rhinovirus (Common Cold) vs Rhinovirus-M (Man Cold)

Bill just couldn't wait for his testosterone to kick in.

'Will you sorry excuse for Vikings shut up and go to sleep?!'

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

"Mom said grandpa killed it so his penis would feel bigger."

I have an awful headache. Do you have an aspirin? Not so fast, little buddy. A real man doesn't mask his symptoms with pharmaceuticals. Even if it feels like a jackhammer on his forehead, a real man grits his teeth and bears it. A real man rides it out the way he'd ride out a bucking bronco. Not everything in life is a test of my manhood. A real man would beg to differ.

The Men Thing. . .

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

'Yes, this bike complies with the town's new noise pollution laws, but we've programmed this MP3 player with brrroom brrroom sounds, so you can still feel macho while riding it.'

'I told you it was a full bodied wine, but you just had to mess with it.'