Machine Learning Apprentice T-Shirts

'I've given the computer artificial intelligence and it can think....

"I wonder if A.I. will inevitably become as tired and depressed as we are."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

"Boss, the AI is actually smarter than all of us! It read our business forecast, jumped up and ran out laughing!"

'...and in 1/100000 of a second, it can compound the programmer's error 87,500 times.'

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

"I fear one day our jobs will be taken over by technology."

'You learn how to make dough later. For now, you're on a knead-to-know basis.'

"What did you download at school today?"

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

"Tell Mrs. Pomeroy we've found the source of that strange hint of musk."

"You'll do everything...accounting, marketing, manufacturing...with no pay or benefits...and three years from now we'll trade you in for a newer, sexier model."

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

Industry and Idleness - The industrious apprentice a favourite, and entrusted by his master.

"You overwatered the plant, again."

'I shall now hand over to our guest speaker, management unit XT-56.'

'Now you know where you left your tools.'

'When you invented vegetables, Sir, did you know that my mother would be able to fit them all into one garden?'

"Well yes, I was shorn by the apprentice, but I don't mind really: everybody has to learn somehow..."

"A TV can insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like a computer."

'What does the internet have against my people?'

A butcher and his apprentice.

"Ambitions . . . to replace mankind."

"Don't you ever run off again to get your oil changed without telling me."

"Sell AI"

'Well, that does not yet look like a wall. Try it again, Liam!'

"I thought I put on my 'big boy' pants this morning but apparently they were my 'fire me' pants."

"Dad, Cruz and I are going to see 'Planet of the Apes.'"

"What, another live person?! Listen, do you have any computers over there I can speak with?"

'Your resume looks good. Let me hear some of your incantations.'

Man behind stage to lady about professor with person under podium: 'That's Professor Allen's understudy.'

A Sophisticated Computer

Boy Learning Violin With Ear Muffs.

"My programming does not permit me to process new information."

"I guess I always wanted to be an electrician. As a little boy, I ran away to join the circuits."