Luxury Pet Ticker Gifts

"Look, it's very simple.Dog food for dogs. Cat food for cats. And lobster for Julius."

Mrs Sutherland and her American Hairless Terrier.

Upper East Side Dog Park

"Pampered?"

"She doesn't eat raw zebra... Where can we get Alaska wild salmon in cream truffle sauce in the middle of Africa?"

Owner Rolls Out Red Carpet For Large Cat

"Wow, an African Blackwood cat-flap and a red carpet! They must really love you!"

"... $3 million, I have $3 million. Can I get $4 million? Yes, $4 million ..."

'You're spoiling that dog!'

"It's not about win or lose. It's about how much money I'm going to make."

"I don't understand. Everyone knows I'm here yet no-one calls in to say hello."

An airplane has stock market tickers on it.

"Penny, what is that scent you have on? I must know." "Don't you just love it, Lucy? It's dead rat."

"Has someone forgotten the cucumber slice and lemon wedge in my spring water again, Edna?"

You're just reading the stuff scrolling across the bottom...

'Stocks rose on news of a proposal to have greed' dropped from the seven cardinal sins.'

"I got tired of webbed feet."

'It's my first dog house with indoor plumbing.'

"I'm not one to complain but the service in this place leaves a lot to be desired."

We have dog spas, dog motels, dog walkers, dog designer clothes...

'My new bed has an orthopedic mattress, a built in water dish, and a privacy curtain, If only it was up on the people bed,,,it would be perfect,'

Posh Doghouse.

'Don't you think you're spoiling Tiddles?'

Country mansion full of dogs.

Dog Mobile

"Oh, my family used to be rich alright: my grandfather was not referred to as a "house cat", but as a "grand manor cat"..."

'Yes, it's a flea-collar, but it's a designer flea-collar!'

'Not only must she love dogs, but she must hate cats.'

'I used to think that no one wanted to talk about the elephant in the room, but now I know it's just because I am a Republican.'

The Labradoodle, 2017

'Mind the step.'

Of course they're real diamonds! It's a designer coat: She wants me to match her purse...

'Treason!'