Luxury Lover Irony Gifts

Fendi Bag Lady

'I really enjoyed my stay in the hospital - I never get served breakfast in bed at home.'

Other girl's luxuries are my necessities.

What say we rough it today and go without ice in our drinks!

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

'He's so rich, when he writes a cheque the bank bounces.'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

Woman pouring perfume into her bath.

"I wish I had her jewelry." "I wish I had his wife." "I wish I had her figure." "I wish I had his money."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'He's holding a sign saying he's marooned with 20 cases of La Tache. A second sign: drop a corkscrew and come back in six months.'

'How do you like my new, deep plush carpet?'

Jewellery Shop: Disposable income spoken here.

'A Ball at the Mansion House'

New Shoes.

How come rich kids do so well on SAT tests? Their parents give them books, fancy trips, lessons and

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

'They've certainly got designs on your purse!'

'Tomorrow we'll look back on this as a night to remember.'

'A coach would be nice. But vegetable will get me a BMW?'

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

A burgandy from when the dow hit a record high.

"Shopping! Now that's what I call quality time!"

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

Woman thinking about luxuries.

"Cat-astrophic Trifecta" "I pooped in Mona's Jimmy Choo handbag." "I knocked over grampa's ashes." "I buried a Barbie in the litter box."

Kensington Fluffies

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

'If you're looking for compensatory materialism on wheels, look no further.'

"I sold my soul for about a tenth of what the damn things are going for now."

'What - no internet? No USB ports? No socket for the coffee machine? No phone? Are you crazy? My husband was a very important CEO!'

'Don't be nervous, relax...he puts his pants on one leg at a time, just like you do. Of course, his pants are tailor made and cost $600 a pair...'

'At first I wasn't going to join, but with a name like that, how could I resist?'

'Too pricey? Perhaps you wish to see something in macaroni and spray paint?'

Smart card.