Luxury Food Lover Pillows

Posh Deli - Fois gras, caviar, animal feed.

Gourmet Deli - Express Check-Out: $1000 or less.

Warning sign at a pop-up shop.

'Your French dip, sir.'

'Of course you're very dear to me - that meal just cost a fortune.'

'Only the years when the market was Bullish...'

"You're the lid to my pot."

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"I chose to stand up to special interest groups!"

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

"I read somewhere that truffles are a gateway fungus."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

"It was wonderful, Henri. Arnold had died and gone to heaven."

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

'Pepperoni: Muse of Pizza'

Victorian Fast Food - 'I'll have the lark pie festooned with eels, a full stilton, two bottles of port,,,'

"Regular service or affected?"

"I think we'll pass up the Château Mouton-Rothschild '34."

'I'll give you a bite of my calamari for one of your stuffed shrimp.'

'I hope you all like stuffing.'

'Just for once, can't we have a picnic without your mates turning up to crawl all over the food?'

"Hedge-fund managers have to have something over their sofas, too."

"Mom said never use that dirty 4-letter word on vacation...DIET."

"There must be a place we can wait on line for an hour before eating."

A man and baby wearing bibs

"That sister of yours sure has some nerve asking for those leftovers - we earned them."

"You cheap shit! Why can't we have a designer divorce?"

"Then again, an honest profile picture would not have got me a wonderful 'Duck Confit with a Chocolat Creme Brulee.'"

"I'm trying to gain 10 pounds before midnight so I can keep my resolution to lose 10 pounds next year."

"Can you recommend a wine that goes well with red meat, Zanex, and Lipitor?"

"I only recommend the 24 oz. Prime rib for big fat guys."