Luxury Flyer T-Shirts

'I flew first class once.. it was neat!'

"First class, or with children?"

'I want to visit the very EDGE of civilisation, to explore the BRUTAL shores of natures most REMOTE regions. If you could manage that with a five star hotel and first class travel it would be perfect.'

he tries to fly all the time but actually never gets airborne

"Now boarding group 50 and up."

"If your luggage is in your clothes it doesn't count!"

'Dad, may I use the plane tonight?'

Royal Bear Force - "Honey at 10 o'clock."

Excess Baggage: Airline CEO's should be forced to work at the check-in counter explaining those hated add-on fees to passengers.

'She's still a novice yet.'

'Sorry I'm late - I was stacked up at the airport.'

The Desert Island Package

Crop duster wanted.

"Now THAT's what I call a budget airline!"

'The best part is being able to fly without taking off your shoes.'

Dog on a plane.

"You can enhance your experience in first class by signing up to get live updates of how miserable everyone in coach is."

"We're at the Grand Marina Hotel in Barcelona. Some sheepdog you turned out to be."

'If you don't have schools on your planet we'd like to go with you!'

"One day he went for a swim in our infinity pool, and I haven't seen him since."

The Queen Mary 2: World's largest ocean liner.

"This patient must be really rich! He brought back the most extravagant illnesses from exotic holiday spots."

'It's very exclusive - if you bump into a celebrity you get a full refund.'

'And upon landing the pilot will give everyone in first class a hug.'

'I want a holiday that will impress the neighbours, which country offers most kudos to the Pound?'

"And that one shows my frequent flier miles."

Commuter on the Orient Express

"This is the life -- I'm never travelling Economy again!"

"May I ask you, sir, if our little jingle on TV had anything to do with your decision to take along the missus?"

'Can't I just travel on my learjet and have fun on my yacht and quit the stupid, boring political part of my presidency?'

"3 ounce liquids! Get your 3 ounce liquids here! Approved and ready for screening! 3 ounce liquids!"

"I know all about the rising costs of rent, utilities and food. I was thinking about it on the company jet on the way to my holiday house on the Cote D'Azur, but I'm afraid the company is under too much financial pressure to give you a raise."

'Forget economy! Put us down for every frill you got!'

'Tomorrow morning I would like breakfast in bed.'

Private Jet