Lover Of Prehistoric Humor Pillows

"I don't care what it was or how hard it was to kill. It makes me look fat."

'I told you it would be useful.'

"If you're tired of stegosaur, go kill something else."

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

"I've considered portraiture, but everyone is so ugly."

Their relationship was doomed to fail. She was frigid, and his arms were too short to rub one out.

'...And they're giving us sixty million years to get in compliance.'

"This is nonsense! Dinosaur and prehistoric men have never met!"

"Don't bother gathering carbs for me, I'm on the Paleo diet."

"Is it free-range?"

'It's a pterodactyl-house.'

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

"Google Earth must have a defective camera. There's a big red spot above our location."

'Gentlemen, invent your engines.'

Grok's Thought Stopping.

"Hey Arthur, check it out, a shooting star. That's a sure sign of luck, my friend."

'Do you mind if I share your post on my wall?'

'They're called 'numbers' -- Now we can have public opinion polls!'

'I just invented business!'

"Has he had all his shots"

"Gorg, you've got to let yourself evolve!"

'Of course it's not signed. Writing hasn't been invented yet.'

"This is what I use for social media."

"Gnork invented the wheel, Shnorz invented the hand axe, and my genius paints lines and circles. . . what do you want to do with it? Maybe building something where you can look at cat pictures? Hahaha!"

"Sorry Darling, I can't reach your itchy spot..."

"All I need now is a trainer!"

"I bought a fake rock to cover up this ugly rock."

"I promise you. One day granite kitchens will be the in thing."

'Well great, he's seen it! There goes one more invention they'll get credit for!'

"Things moving too fast. We need to get back to our roots. And grubs."

'This type of injury wasn't so common, before the invention of the wheel. '

Early detection was rarely helpful.

'Sorry, Gowp, but I'm rteplacing you as Head of Advertising.'

'Well yes, it is a Jurassic model...OK, I'll knock off two bucks.'