Love With A Twist Pillows

'Caller Will be required to show ID.' Man holds up ID stating 'Your husband'.

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'Why, of course I remember our first date -- I had filet mignon, potatoes au gratin, sauteed....'

"...until death do you a favor."

Online Dating

Cinderella and Charming the Clown

"He was a grouch when I met him. It was love at first gripe."

This year Mike decides to make his own Valentine's cards.

Frank, this is carrying safe sex too far.

'Marry me, and make me the happiest man in the world.' 'You want BOTH?!'

She never could tell when he was being sarcastic.

'You were right, you are in the placebo group.'

"Now will you do something funny."

"I never actually said I was spiderman...I just said that no one has ever seen us in the same room together."

'I got you 10 roses. I believe strong relationships are based on the metric system.'

"She gets her musical ability from me."

The Clown Hit

Fairy tales reimagined for the 21st century. Jack and the Beanstalk

'Just doing the school run.'

'Group hug anyone?'

Nothing like a Valentine from my boyfriend David... the cardiologist.

"Julie, are you live tweeting this!?"

'Do you , Cynthia, who is completely free of any genetic engineering, take Rodney, who is equally free...'

Woman at Chocolate Lovers Leap, with coffin-shaped selection box at foot of cliff,

'Single Heating and Cooling technician in search of intelligent, attractive woman. Send picture of your furnace & AC.'

'I like a man in a suit.'

"They're love poems alright, but he cuts up the lines, throws them in the air and reassembles them randomly..."

"I'm just going to step into the bank to get some money for dinner."

"I do - but it might just be the liquor talking."

'I had a great time tonight. I'd like to see you again in about six months.'