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Love chair

Couples On a Love Seat.

"Gimme a large cheeseburger, regular fries and a diet root beer!"

"Doesn't seem like 6 hours on the couch, but you can't argue with a lethargy tracker."

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

'She'll never look for me here.'

"Oh joy. Looks like the turkey is almost done..."

Chillaxing!

'No, I am not finished with the comics section, now give me back my glasses!'

Sick person curled up at home

'Where does cozy end and tepid begin?'

"I'd like an aisle seat, please."

Darn it, you're touching my half of the loveseat again. (Published originally on Feb. 20, 2008.)

The new fall content.

"I'm not sure I like your working vacations."

'I'm able to live the American dream by getting paid in Euros, running my business form an offshore tax haven and getting European style universal health care.'

Flexible working

'I'd say the couch is contouring a bit TOO much to their bodies.'

'No idea. He's been there for as long as I can remember.'

Champagne and Oysters

'Now that I have your attention...'

"As a frequent flier, you'll be entitled to stay in our airport lounge for up to a week during delays."

'Well played, sir.'

"You have reached the samaritans. If you are a farmer press one, a pensioner press two, small business owner press three...."

"I'm afraid the jacuzzi is out of order madam"

"Oooo!... Leather! I'd love to shed on that!!"

Rest distracted by moles.

Hockney by the Pool

"I'm not sitting on your laptop because it's warm... I just wanted to reset your password and ruin your day."

"Tell me boss, how is the holiday weather in Hawaii?"

"Stay tuned to 6, the channel to snooze by."

"The eyes of the beast burrowed deep into his soul with laser-sharp precision. In a moment, Liam would succumb to the relentless silent stare of his nemesis and best friend. One question remained: kibble or canned?"

"Now bend forward to touch floor between feet- try to keep knees straight."

A woman teaches a cat maths as a man eats chips and drinks beer with a dog.