Love Life Enhancer Pillows

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

"I just love the way you're so endlessly inventive in the bedroom."

Kissing the Blarney Stone.

"You wanted the magic back in our relationship..."

Ego Increasing School

'If we respect each other, contraception makes sense!'

"It was meant to be a surprise romantic dinner for two, but to cut a long story short, it's been a recipe for disaster."

'You have to do something...My husband just doesn't look at me the way he used to.'

"Estoy aqui abajo!" ( I'm down here!)

Make love not war

'I know you love her and want to protect her. But it's wrong to laminate her.'

"We have box shapes for every commitment level."

Woman does a strip tease on a remote control.

'Short brown hair. Very cuddly, good in bed.'

'And he seems to think he's God's gift to women.'

"I can't wait 'til we're so close we don't have to talk."

"You make me want to be a better bag."

Another Hot and Heavy Night of Explaining

'It's all downhill from here.'

'Of course you're my first - Why do you men always ask that question?'

Archers.

"I think you are exceeding the speed limit."

Sex shop

Test dummies holding 'Kama Sutra For Dummies' manual.

Brenda tests to see if Karl can truly handle the low points of living together.

"Dude has got his s**t together!"

'That's very sweet of you, Professor Grossmertz, but love is only a theory.'

'Well, what seems to be the problem?'

"I asked her if she wanted to go to dinner. She said yes and then she went to dinner."

"You're 30? Me too!"

Valentines

'What's the definition of an ideal man? After he's made love for hours, he turns into a pizza.'

Luckily there are still men with charm and style.