Lost Remote Survivor Gifts

Dave invents the remote belt

"Hey, you stick your neck out on a regular basis, it's gonna happen. The important thing is to just get up and keep moving forward."

"The batteries in his TV remote died. The shock of not being able to use it for two minutes has put him in a temporary state of shock."

"Hello? Speaking, not listening."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

'You brought my slippers?... What kind of rescue dog are you?!'

"I really got used to working from home."

"Wanna play 'Waitin’ on the Cable Guy'?"

Busking during a pandemic

Emergency Pants

'Honey's a real problem for me. Whenever I try to cut back, I just end up binging on campers.'

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

"Now that she works from home we never get to use the computer."

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'He needs professional HELP!'

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

"You'll be allowed to work from home two days a week... Saturday and Sunday."

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

'Look at the bright side. Think of our mutual funds going up, up, up!'

Tax grab.

"When you are done exercising your finger, the cat would like to talk to you!"

Man struggling to carry a giant tv remote control with hundreds of channels.

"I bet you thought that because you'd been castaway for forty years, you'd get off with your six month prison sentence."

'Eating all of this coconut is making me feel really horny.'

'Thanks for tuning in - we'll try to pander to you.'

'What luck!'

"Breakfast's ready, darling."

'Thank you for calling the IRS... Press one for laughter in the background, press two for crying in the background.'

A diet high in cholesterol can be dangerous to your health.

Stranded Techie Needs Batteries

'I sure hope you're a marriage counselor.'

"Mr. Crusoe, you have some heft overdue fines."

Welcome centre

'What luck. It's Kosher.'