Lost Luggage Expert Gifts

"I installed a cam in my luggage to see if it's having a better vacation than I am."

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'What's with the overnight bag, Orville?'

'My wife is going to kill me. All her shopping coupons are in that lost luggage.'

"You shouldn't have stopped to go to the bathroom, sir - you were late claiming your luggage, so we raffled it off."

Technique #54 airlines are adopting for handling excessive carry on luggage.

Excess Baggage: Before starting your rental car, be sure the radio is turned all the way down.

Airport

"This trip, we'd like to go everywhere our luggage goes."

"I'd pack light if it wasn't for the shoes."

"Sorry, sir. The baggage must match the passenger."

"How's my tripping you up?"

'My husband, Bill, works at the airport - I still haven't opened my birthday presents from three years ago.'

An argument between a passenger and a train porter.

Woman goes to Origami Airport.

'Arrivals and Departures - this railroad governed by Heisenberg's uncertainty principle'

'Next time I insist on flying first class!'

"You overpacked again."

'No, the sign's not wrong. Most of our guests like to party all night.'

Airline concerns.

"We're thinking... this year just send us to whatever country our luggage is accidentally sent to!"

'Don't you think it's time we bought new suitcases?'

"Just barking will do."

Lost luggage turning up on Mars.

Baggage Claim

All gates.

Seagulls landing

'Pack this yourself, Miss?' (Nelly the elephant at customs).

"I would have left a long time ago, but I could never find luggage I really liked."

'Oh look! We must be coming into land at Heathrow.'

"We found our luggage in Cabo, but it's way happier there and isn't coming back."

Traveller with a globe on the front of his car.

Lost Luggage/Lost Passengers

Traveller's Luggage.

'It appears to be a set of luggage earmarked for Dallas, mission control.'