Longevity Thinker T-Shirts

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

37 years in the same position.

"Have you heard? There's talk about raising the retirement age to 170?"

'If you want to live a long time, try not to do anything that will kill you.'

'What you seem to be suffering from is longevity.'

"Haven't you wondered why I live about 50 years longer thank you?"

"It appears that you'll definitely outlive your usefulness."

Healthy living has added years to Melvin's life.

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

"Take a look - that's us in ninety years."

"Good old Frank. He was always thinking of others."

"But, doctor, what are the advantages of living longer?"

"I've outlived my conventional and alternative doctors."

My secret of living to 103? I stay active throwing out junk mail and alert dueling with telephone sales people!

Doctor to Banana: 'Looks like you're going to a ripe old age.'

"Scientists have extended the life of the fruit fly."

"The doc says I won't even make it another 45 years."

'I have the feeling my expiration date is nearly up.'

'Great news, Methuselah Tests show you'll live to be 100!'

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

My philosophy ... If you can't beat 'em, outlive 'em.

"Oh f*ck yes. Let's make these f*ckers live for-f*cking-ever."

"He's one hundred and five years old and I think it's disgusting!"

'One day, this will all be your fault.'

"Breathe in...now breathe out. Excellent! Just remember to keep doing that for the next few years and you'll be fine."

"That's Ms Pitt. She's been entrenched on high alert at the front desk for 42 years."

'No booze, no red meat, easy on the carbs...I've given up living so I can live longer.'

"I think my fat has GPS. Every time I lose some, it always finds its way back home."

"Look at it this way - the more birthdays you have, the longer you live!"

"He said his goal was to make it to 100."

"Now they're saying 80 is the new 70. So, when's the new dead?"

"So, Ms. Mayfly. Where do you see yourself in five years?"