Local Value Seeker T-Shirts

Investments: Buy local! Our 'Value' funds are all New York values.

'1,2,3 4,5,6 7,8,9...'It's the little things that count.(little figurines counting).

'If by 'great', you mean 'terrible', then yes, we have plenty of great beers for under $4.00 a six-pack.'

"Are you mad with us, Mrs. Bimmelman?"

"Jersey Tomatoes" vs. "Jersey toMAHtoes"

Sales Research shows it's too big for them to carry home, sir.

Beef Stew.

"Yeah, but this is a cat on a skateboard being arrested by a cop with a tattoo of the Confederate flag!"

Crisis of values

"Ooh look, the high street's evolved to survive!"

Investments: Yes, we have organic, local & cruelty-free stocks.

Investments: We have locally grown stocks.

Frank N. Stein - Evirnomentalist.

"If I paid you what you're worth, you'd be working for nothing!"

"Everything I know about being human I learned from animals."

Pride - from The Seven Deadly Sins.

Mom & Pop Grocerette

"Did you get it at Bed, Birch and Beyond?"

"Local shopping, local eating, and...I married the girl next door."

Don't be afraid of criticism. Openly ask for feedback so you can improve service.

"That fly paper's paid for itself."

Think Zero Defects

'It's a sunset, Billy. It's not selling anything.'

"Well, sure I'd like to instill the values of hard work and discipline, but that takes hard work and discipline."

"The bowling ball represents what you want to be paid, while the mini-pea represents what I think you're worth."

'Do you have any oranges?'

Customer: 'Do you have anything for the same price that doesn't cost so much?'

"The great is $54.99, and I do have a near-great for $23.99."

'Dad, can I put my pocket money into a pension fund to protect me from the economic winter?'

"Foreign wines have ruined me for domestics. I still shop local, but I gripe global."

Wall Street Hens

"Actually, the 24/7 Roadside Assistance kinda makes up for the 24/7 vehicle depreciation."

'Please... take... a... moment... to... complete... our... brief... survey... to... help... improve... customer... satisfaction... '

Locovores

Detectorist meteorite.