Local News Aficionado T-Shirts

'Gossip now updated every five minutes.'

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

UK border controls relaxed.

Oligarchy

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Meet the Enemy

'We interrupt this programme for a sex flash.'

Our Two Parties, Explained

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

There's a crew here from 60 minutes and they're coming this way.

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

Man Reading Laptop.

"Since you have already been convicted by the media, I imagine we can wrap this up pretty quickly."

Matryoshka/ Russian Gas Cylinders

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

Fear of news.

'...Next election voters will have a choice of democrat, republican and 'generic'.'

"Wow. . . is that you, Mr Erdogan. . . Mr Kim Jong-un. . . Mr Putin. . . Mr Maduro. . . Mr. Bin-Salman. . . Mr al-Assad. . ."

'What I have to do first?!'

Trump Destroying U.S. the Postal Service

Capital Tours

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

Idlib, Syria - The final stage

Reporter #6: television.

'Hey!! What gives, there's nothing but a bunch of squiggly lines on this newspaper.'

"...in other news: Google has been admitted to the United Stations..."

Hang in There Democracy!

"But the good news is Trump has broken off diplomatic relations with them only on Twitter..."

'I suppose that's where things get ironed out.'

Charades