Lobster Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Have you seen my husband? I left him by the lobster tank a few minutes ago!'

"I'm afraid we're closed. The lobsters escaped and killed the chef."

"...And I named this one Terry..."

Your lobster was off!

Lobster playing the violin

"I hate shaking hands with him, he always squeezes as hard as he can!"

'Do you think we can cuddle?'

Desert Island Meals.

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'Hold on, I'll get the camera.'

Odd Angles,a monthly strip on coarse angling.

"Mind the whale, dear."

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

Man Fishing: Pulling sign attached to hook from fish out of water: Gone Swimmin'

Crab with a clown face.

"I was drawing a whale, but I ran out of paper."

'Hmphh. Happy as clams, indeed. They're just all on Prozac.'

Clownfish entertain sea life by hitting each other in the face with octopi.

The Da Vinci Cod

'This fish isn't tank broken - I want a refund!'

'Redneck Goldfish' Earl knew better than to watch Oprah while drinking.

Al, why is my goldfish zigzagging? Perhaps sharing my beer with him was a case of misplaced generosity on my part.

'I don't mind being caught,it's that kissing I hate.'

"Seriously, you looked so perfect that at first, I thought you were a lure..."

'First he warms our bowl, now he's feeding us... And you thought he wasn't friendly.'

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

Selfish shellfish - 'You kids share your food and stop being shellfish!'

"I tell ya - if I ever stop moving, I'll die."

"Lap fish..."

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

'Next Please...' (Joe's Sharpening Service).

Batman O' War

"I believe that's a Montessori school."

Overeaters anonymous meeting today at 5:00.

'Rats, I don't think we'll ever get this thing going: It's flooded again...'