Loan Enthusiasts Pillows

"I didn't go to college, but I took out and am defaulting on school loans to make it look like I did."

"I’ve combined all your outstanding debt into what we here in the banking business like to call a honkin’ big loan."

Kids ask repetitively: 'Is the recession over yet?'

'This graph may need some explaining...'

Bank cashier sits near sign: 'Please do not ask for credit, as refusal often offends'.

Sure, it helps to be a blood-sucking parasite, but that's not all it takes to be a stockbroker...

'Regarding where you stand for a payrise - you don't.'

Businessman with two boxes: 'Nothing Ventured' and 'Nothing Gained'.

'Wait a minute....!

"I have this relationship with money, it's complicated."

Dog Beginning For A Loan

"Whoops! There go those darned interest rates again!"

Bertha's: A bank that's more than a bank. It's also an insurance broker and a beauty parlor.

'A loan, certainly, how much would you like?'

Yes we can increase your overdraft, but I'd like to see a little more grovelling, please.

"Yes, we've refused your loan application."

'I used to chase cars. Now I chase yield.'

All Major Cash Honored.

"You've been a very bad man and we like that. So now, we're going to send you to London."

"I see it's payday again Perkins!"

Don't be too mad baby... I got a great mortgage deal!

And your repayment period starts...Now!

Security/Savings

"We've got borrower's remorse."

'How much do you want?' - 'How much have you got?'

'You need to alter your portfolio allocation. Right now it's 25% stocks, 15% bonds and 60% margin loans.'

"Happiness is more important than money,but it is easier to count money."

"O.K. final question: I'm thinking of a number between one and 100."

Loan trap

'Are you kidding, you credit's better than ours.'

"If you had $1,000, and I asked you for a loan of $23.47, what percent of your original money would you left?"

'You'll need a better credit rating before we can give you a credit card?'