Lively Speaker T-Shirts

'Not to be critical, John, but you need to put more life into your sermons.'

They hated me.

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

Man selling 'pearls of wisdom'.

'I did it all from memory.'

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.

'And in conclusion.'

"‘How I Spent My Summer Vacation in a Freaking Gymnastics Camp and Nearly Broke My Neck,’ by Delia McConnell."

'You've probably heard of me. I'm an author, consultant and lecturer in the fields of authoring, consulting and lecturing.'

"A real old fashioned fire and brimstone message today Preacher."

"I'll pause for a moment so you can let this information sink in."

"In closing, let me tell you that never in the universe have I spoken before such an attentive audience."

"My lecture is about our short attention spans and what a lovely day it is I should be walking but tomorrow maybe I’ll cut the grass..."

Geography is still fascinating, thought Bob.

Totally Nude Hand Puppets.

'Mr. Speaker! Mr. Speaker! Mr. Speaker. . . He didn't show up for work today.'

Musical pill box

Woman standing behind boss with sign saying 'Applause'.

"We have a question from an audience member, who asks: 'how do you stay optimistic during difficult times?'"

'When pastors take sports analogies too far...'

"Back when we were in college, and occasionally sleeping together, I never thought I'd be here, toasting you at your wedding to a woman."

"Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today."

"Just get out there and be yourself – or better yet, someone like me."

'I understand the plight of average crustaceans... Because I'm just an average crustacean myself.'

Quiet night? Liven up that game of solitaire with a Mexican wave.

Unlucky Tonight's Seminar Will Change Your Life,

"So let's all remember... 'Believe in yourself and others will believe in you!'"

'HEYYY!! He's cheating!'

"What a pleasure it is to be here. . . looking out on all the smiling faces."

House leadership 'cry'-teria

'So you're the boy who wants to be a chugger.'

I speak for all MPs, Mr Speaker, when I say 'swift recovery from your laryngitis'.

'Do you think I overdid the eco stuff?'