Little Communicator Pillows

'What do I want for Christmas? - Didn't you get my TEXT?'

"What do you think I can get for it on the blackboard market?"

"Barking sometimes helps me relax. But then it drives the neighbors crazy."

'I don't know what 'peer pressure' is, but it makes a GREAT excuse!'

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"The answer to bone loss is to bury them deeper.'

"They communicate through clicks and taps."

Text Culture

"Go ahead. Press one for more options."

'The World will speak hip-hop tomorrow.'

"You don't whisper anymore."

"I'm all for pushing them out of the nest, but maybe next time we could wait till they hatch."

"Just a brief moment, Linda, to thank you for my delicious meals. And if you need me by your side... just whistle." "What fresh hell is this?"

"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."

"Bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark bark" "Fwd: fwd: fwd: bark bark bark bark"

"You understand that they call you 'good boy' because they can't remember your name, right? They never forget my name, they care about me..."

'You'll get five paid sick days, plus an additional two when you're shedding your skin.'

'Polly wants a cracker! Fetch!'

Pet psychic -- yup, she's for real.

"I think it loves us."

"Just what emotion is your emotional support dog supporting?"

"Hold that thought, my love. I'm listening – I just need to pee on those daylilies."

"Yes, that's the tree with all the squirrels from yesterday. And no, I don't know where they are today."

'My allowance isn't much - but I have a great benefits package!'

"And here is the very stone that finally enabled us to figure out what all those dogs and cats were saying."

"Are you happy with your current ball?"

'At first I was grounded, but my lawyer was able to plea bargain it down to 30 minutes in the Time Out Chair.'

"Obviously, I can't fly like you, but if you teach me, I can probably sing like you..."

Boy in toy car talking on phone.

The bluebird of passive-aggressiveness

"Go on, say it again, 'I love you' in Armadillo."

'Modern romance'

"I speak Latin, you know."

"I'm returning home triumphant - do you need me to pick anything up?"

'I'm having a bad whisker day.'