Litter Critic Pillows

"I love this time of year when the leaves hide the empty burger boxes, beer cans, chocolate wrappers..."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

Thomas Mann.

First Novels.

Blue Stockings

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

Jean-Paul Sartre

"Now I really hate poetry."

Why we need poetry. . .

German Expressionist Breakfast

It's Dostoevsky. It's Melville. It's Flaubert. But it doesn't dance.

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

Shakespeare was bisexual

Struggling with issues from his own childhood, the Bedroom Bandit would sneak in and jumble children's room across the nation. Not a mother believed it.

The Forbidden Joyce Kilmer

"I did the math. If we want to read all of Proust in this lifetime, we have to start tomorrow morning."

"Oh, this old thing?"

'You do a passable Jerry Lewis, but your Frank Sinatra stinks.'

George Orwell

The Proust of Twitter

Emily Dickinson: Mime - "I think she's saying something about death."

"It's felt to be his most thought provoking work."

The World's Biggest Book Club

Shakespeare loved a grammar joke

Beckett for Beginners: "Waiting for Thumbkin"

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

Günter Grass

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

"I’ve seen better metaphors in my litter box."

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

"I think globally, but I tend to pollute locally."

"I like his earlier work better, particularly the ones I said I didn't like at the time."