Literature Junkie Gifts

'You're lucky. My novel went straight to landfill.'

Edgar Allen Poe

First Novels.

Voltaire

"Now I really hate poetry."

"No writers were harmed or mistreated in the preparation of this story."

"It turns out everyone here is self-published."

'So Captain Ahab, I put it to you that you were deliberately stalking my client!'

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

George Orwell

"Author does not do tricks."

Goodnight Moon for the Misbegotten

Trilby - 'The old studio'.

"I've got a bad feeling about this."

"He's got lifeless eyes. Black eyes...like a DOLL'S EYES!!"

'Is that where you keep the banned books?'

"So, hw ws yr smmr?"

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

'Rehab centre' "I'm addicted to Irvine Welsh"

"My only love sprung from my only hate!"

"No chips, but I did snag the new Hiaasen."

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

Archeologist Deciphers Limerick Heiroglyphs

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"We used up our planet's energy source and we're here to hijack yours. Where do you keep all your coffee?"

"Maybe I don't like stunning debuts."

"If I Can Make One Critic Smile..."

"You have no idea what it's like to be a 'just between you and me' person in a 'just between you and I' world."

"He was a big man, but he moved like a cat."

"I'm in children's books, myself."

"Heart transplant surgery waiting room"

Trilby - 'The sweet melodic phrase.'

"Did you read my review on Amazon? Four out of four people found it helpful."

"Skip the funny voices tonight—O.K., Dad?"

The Book Lover