Liquor Store Owner T-Shirts

"We also stock non-alcoholic wine" "Why?"

Bottle Opener Sticks 'Em Up For Armed Robber In Liquor Store

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

"BOOZE"

A Good Batch.

'Men are like fragments of soap... they get together in bars!'

'We have 800 beers on tap. If you want to hear all of them, you'll have to get here earlier, we close in six hours.'

Sale on the same stuff as last week.

Cut Price

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

"A pint! I'll need proof, and that's human years, not dog years!"

Beer Stall

Shaken not stirred

"It's a new countertop draft system for craft beer!"

Best Before 5th Pint.

"It's kind of sweet when they're all settled in like this."

As long as there are husbands, we'll get our's money's worth!

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

"Have you seen my dad?"

"... And to this day, she still blames the dog!"

The Reaper's Arms

Traditional Ale - Traditional Drunk

It's our new twin-handle beer mug. It's for manly, two-fisted drinkers, as well as weaklings like you who can't lift it with one hand.

"Business is booming! Come in and see our explosive sales today!"

"Stranger, you're sitting in the boss's personal spot. That's why they moved the dart board over your head."

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

'You shouldn't knock them back so quickly.'

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

"Quick, I need a drink. Someone just called me Ma'am."

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

'I'm sorry, we don't serve spirits.'

Infinity Tavern

CASA DE JOY PREMIUM TEQUILA STONE BISSETT DISTILLERY CONT. NET.1000 ML 40% ALC Vol.

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

Buy one beer, get one free. If I may paraphrase a famous quote, "Beer is proof that God has mixed feelings about us and wants us to be hungover."