Liquor Store Manager Pillows

"I believe you'll like our company. We pay our employees time and a fifth."

A Good Batch.

'That's it then - I'll take the slinky high-heeled cocktail number in a 5 and the everyday workshoe in a 7...'

"Meet the embellisher 3-5 pm"

"Excuse me, I'm here to do some sole searching."

'Well, gotta get up early and start drinking again.'

Best Before 5th Pint.

'If you're having trouble finding what you want, try our other store--'Cabernet Sauvignons Starting with the Letter B'.'

"How about we settle your tab from the regular season?"

"Is Pinot Noir where you want to be?"

'I'm having trouble with my drinking. Arthritis in my elbow.'

'Bread, milk, cereal, sugar, sausage, potatoes, beans, biscuits. Click! So easy, but I do miss the sexy till lady.'

"Store policy is that I need a note from your wife."

CASA DE JOY PREMIUM TEQUILA STONE BISSETT DISTILLERY CONT. NET.1000 ML 40% ALC Vol.

Pub restrooms; Thugs - Thugettes

"It's difficult to attract a younger customer when our main demographic is babies."

"You can't find the menswear department? Oh, I'm sorry, Sir- I was standing in front of it."

Wanna talk about it?

"I think he said he wants to buy 'just the one'. You'd better fetch the manager"

"That should read $20.00. I'd make the correction, but I don't want to be accused of price-fixing."

'They're both nice - which can you ill afford least?'

SupermarketAwful Market.

'I've drawn up a health and safety policy for the company.'

Sports Memorabilia: Help wanted-losers need not apply.

The Cavern Club - "One for the long and winding road Mr McCartney?"

You have had enough

Beatlemania: Open 24/8

"Bye now... it's always nice to see you and little Tommy!"

Office Supplies: New and improved motivational posters, now with 25% more inspiration.

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

Self-Checkout.

'Gents toilet? Ah, got me there...'