Lion Tamers In Suits Gifts

'Clients can get a little tricky at these product analysis sessions.'

'Cat or dog?' - 'A little of both.'

Litter Tray Training

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

'No, that wasn't your mother calling to ask if you were okay. That was your mother calling to ask if I was okay.'

'Do you have any books on controlling little monsters?'

(No caption. Signs on file cabinets drawers read, "Files Saved to Hard Drive," "Files Saved to Disk," "Files Saved to Traveldrive," "Trash.")

A Clown pretends to put his head in the mouth of a TV lion.

Parenting Business Deals

Lion Tamers School - Lion licking his lips examiner marking a fail

"Miss Jones! Clear my schedule until I get this sorted out!"

'Before we start, would everyone please put your cell phone in the middle of the table?'

"I find that my strongest passwords are those created when the cat walks across the keyboard."

Education Guidance

'They've been in there all day writing the job description.'

'The health and safety officer isn't happy. He want's you to tie your shoelaces.'

'Mr Godzilla - you need anger management!'

'He's a control freak but the treats are good.'

'Nah, the circus ain't what it used to be. It's got all fancy and hard since Circ de Something started.'

"It's a jungle out there. You'll love it."

'When I said you'd have to jump through hoops, I meant you'll have to literally jump through hoops.'

'What's your tolerance for risk?'

'Where did we go wrong?'

'This is the part I hate most - he's got terrible bad breath !'

"Yes, it's dangerous but, if there is a power there, think what it will mean for HD TVs, cell phones, ipods ... "

Matador.

"You goo-goo, you gaa-gaa. But when push comes to shove, you whaa-whaa."

'I ate three cloves of garlic before the show: Check the Tamer's expression when he puts his head in my mouth...'

"And for your entree, sir?"

Circus Act

'Oh my, have you seen the size of the new tamer's head? I can't fit that in my mouth...'

'Now, you'd better pick up your toys or no bath!'

'That's right kids: I jumped through rings of fire when I was with the Circus!'

"Sorry I'm late, I've brought cappuccinos for everyone."

"Our driverless smart car texted me saying it went to get an oil change because I was too lazy to do it. Is there a way to disable its rudeness?"