Linguistic Gymnasts T-Shirts

"Kevin's job as a train announcer seriously affected his love-life..."

Pinocchio's Second Realization

"The overthinker"

Eldrow

"So, like, don't make any big plans for this weekend."

"I stand corrected."

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

'Come on Jill, they say the water's well good.'

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

"I swear, Mr. Drumpf, I meant it in the best sense of the word." "Mr. Drumpf is a moron."

"I said to get a Tomcat, not a wombat!"

"That's hardly necessary!"

"Excuse me, Doc, my attention wandered. What type of deficit disorder did you say I had?"

How a poet works

'I'll try to keep my remarks brief.'

'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'

'So I said 'You must be frackin' joking!''

Heart To Heart

"I think I've eaten something that hasn't agreed with me."

''Time is an illusion'? - How long did it take you to come up with that?'

Artichoking victim

Wordplay: Mandate - Escort Agency.

"I've been window-shopping..."

"You think you're pretty holy, huh!"

'Doctor, my speech bubble has slipped!'

Multitasking

Professional Couples

Giant brain with an arrow through it sits on Freud's psychiatric couch.

Keeping fit by weight training with 'le creuset' saucepans

The Acrobat/Musician

Brains versus management books.

Match Point

'All my life, I've been hearing about this 'pound of cure.' How much does it cost by the pound?'

"I appreciate you keeping up with the vernacular of the times, but please refrain from referring to the billion-dollar restructuring as 'The Dealio'."

'Relax, baby, and pay no attention to that old man behind you.'