Lighthearted Jokesters T-Shirts

You show me yours and I'll show you mine.

Children disturbing a heart rate reading.

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

"But you didn't say they had to make sense - you just told us to write a thousand words a day."

"What are you trying to tell me, girl? Are you hungry? You’re not hungry? The squirrels are skinny-dipping in the pool? Cats are making a hook rug out of your bed? You dug up Jimmy Hoffa?!" "Mitch liked messing with his dog's head."

I think he's joking. "Placebo" can't be a real medical science term. It sounds like a funny name for a clown.

Men dancing

Man on desert island using elastic to shoot him off the island.

"Nice try, Frank. Mother is still coming for the weekend."

Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep and with the sun if I've found death, please excuse my morning breath.

Hey boss, that generic soap you gave me isn't really cleaning the cups. Mind if I go get some brand name stuff? Are you insane? There's zero difference between generic and brand name products. Corporate America just cons people into thinking "you get what you pay for." Don't be a stooge, Rudy. Don't fall for it. Now get in there and scrub those cups, minion! Strike a blow for the little guy against corporate lies! Wait ... I'm very confused. Are you a right-winger or a left-winger? You mean in w

Santa Claus stuck in a chimney sitting in a hospital emergency room.

Dentist as psychoanalyst with tooth patient on couch

'Hey,mom-have you seen my pet frog?'

'Okay Dad, time to unwind.'

"Let's see how brave you are without your gun."

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! Malaprop Man! I hear you told people in England you're royalty. Yeah, at first they didn't realize that I was only Joe King. I was an error to the throne who rained for forty days and forty knights. It's disappointing though that I never got to see a pig riding contest at Bucking Ham palace. And I never met Sherlock Holmes. He's the guy who followed the foot prince!

'But seriously, folks... Who knows how many blondes it takes to screw in my latest invention?'

"Your Covid-19 Test Results Are In..."

'On the outside I'm all ho-ho-ho. But inside I feel weak and shaky, like a bowl full of jelly.'

'As I feared, the X-ray shows that you are crying inside.'

'Hello? Animal control?'

Celebrity Clown Rehab: 'And so how does that make you feel, Chuckles?'

"He was right about saving that box. It did come in handy."

The little rascal! He knows we're watching him and that he's safe next to his warren, so he's mooning us!

"It was worth a try."

'We're having the whole place done over in pistachio!'

"Doctor I think I'm a moth..."

"Come on, what would be the point of being a pilot fish if I couldn't wear cool pilot sunglasses?"

"If we were really best friends, you would be fetching my slippers once in awhile."

Sticker: 'How's my driving you nuts?'

A Please Wipe Your Feet mat with words mixed up at the Dyslexic clinic.

I laughed so hard that milk came out my nose.

"It's heartbreaking. He blew out his arm training for the season's big modern art exhibit, and he hasn't been able to get anything in the strike zone since then!"