Light-hearted Escapist Gifts

"I found your contact lens."

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

Cake Escape

"Yes dear, I know lots of people have a second honeymoon. But we only got back from our first one last week."

"Let's go back to our cabana, get into bed and shop online."

Young Houdini

'The marvelous thing about a Singles cruise is, if you don't find an interesting man, you can drown your sorrows with interesting food.'

"But honey, I've spent my last 30 years pretending to look busy. I can't quit overnight."

Contestants defeated in the ring toss competition head back to the hotel to recharge for a late night nude hot tub partying and 'bootie shakin' erotic cage fetish dancing.

Occational lovers - "Let's see...work,work,work,time to recuperate.." "How about Friday."

As you like it - One way of catching fish

'Remember Machu Picchu, darling? We sat watching that fabulous sunset and suddenly you turned to me and asked me for a pre-nuptial agreement?'

'It's times like this I miss the business channel.'

"It's a trashy, unrealistic romance novel about a beautiful maiden and an equally handsome prince who fall instantly and passionately in love...naturally it's a New York Times Bestseller!"

'To attract the most talented spies we're changing our package . . . to jammie dodgers and a gobstopper.'

'Henceforth, nurse Blum will be the nurse to take your blood pressure.'

"The jury's still out on whether you should whisk me away to Paris."

"This is highly confidential, so, yes, we built a little fort."

A woman reads a romance novel.

Sleeping Tiger

'There she is, dreaming about Zorro again.'

'This is kind of a bad time - could we have an affair AFTER tax day'

Fish get smart.

"Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach him how to fish and he can avoid work his whole life."

BIBLE STORIES, 'This is full of battle and other BOY stuff - not a single romantic comedy!'

"Hold it, there's someone on my other island!"

Husband building a wall around his wife on the beach.

"Too bad we only see each other when we're hungry! I know! Let's go on a date, a real date!"

'A loaf of bread, a jug of wine, safe sex and wine.'

James Fenimore Cooper

'Where are all these alien abductors when you need them?'

"You're the one who's always saying you want to get away from it all."

'Oh dear... it's going to be a very long year and a day...'

"You'll catch her if you're quick. She made a dash for the back door."