Lifetime Reflector T-Shirts

'Dang! -- STILL no lifetime achievement award!'

'Just ask yourself -- Are you better off now than you were two thousand years ago?'

"I cancelled the cable, turned off the phone, shut down the internet. . . where the hell am I??"

"We have to stop meeting like this – people are starting to talk ‘psychiatric ward.’"

"Remember the days we could drink and party all night and we thought guys in their 50's were old geezers?"

'I think we're losing sight of our roots.'

He was a great dodgeball player. Who's in heaven now. He will be missed.

"Who knew a lifeless box could spread such fear? It came from the mailbox."

"Maybe a career as a tour guide wasn't for you."

'A cocoon? Boy, he is having a mid-life crisis!'

When can you get rid of the crutches? Doctor says now, lawyer says not yet.

"I've been to the office..."

'There is no room in the church for damaged goods Rodney.'

Woman wearing Miss 1977 sash: 'Things pretty much went downhill from there.'

'I recognize my incapacity to adequately fulfill the ministry entrusted to me...so I'm stepping down.'

"Tireless worker? Well, when I was young, yes, but not anymore I can tell you..."

'We've all read the report cover to cover. Anyone read all that stuff in the middle?'

Overcoming obstacles on life's journey.

"What's that look? C'mon, you're scaring me!"

'It's middle age spread.' 'I can't believe I'm not thinner.'

"Bye honey, have a great day at work."

Retirement...Retirement...

Would be interested in a job inspecting mirrors? I could see myself doing that.

"I fondly remember the time before the money ran out."

"I resigned of my own free will."

Death of Arafat.

"You have your whole life ahead of you, Billy...boy, I sure don't envy you!"

Coming-of-age novels

'When I was your age, the closest thing I had to texting was spelling things out in my alphabet soup.'

"I'm back from my class reunion. Everyone else was unemployed,"

"School today, school tomorrow... School next week, school next month... Sometimes, when I think about where I'm going...I can't help but feel that maybe I've already been there."

"I was middle class once. Some of it was fun."

'Hey, don't bother me about the rioting in Cardiff -- talk to the Prince of Wales, there.'

Society of Martyrs