Lifestyle Blogger T-Shirts

'I'm worried about not being worried...'

'Jimmy, I can't see!'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

"And which regional cuisine would you be interested in this evening—Northwester, Southwestern, Southeastern, or Northeastern?"

Studies show foods work miracles!

"How fresh is the calamari?"

"When are they going to change the 'feature'?"

'This is too small. Get me a 12...How many times?! I'm a 10 or a 12 on top and a 12 or 14 on the bottom depending on the shop, the cut of the fabric, the ambient air temperature, and the rotation of Pluto...and we always try the 10 first capiche?'

Your lobster was off!

'It's my favorite.'

'Strong curry for two and a fire-extinguisher.'

"A naked dress is perfect when you have nothing to wear."

Sister Cities

"I'm prescribing a mild sedative. Go wine shopping and get yourself a nice Chablis."

"I always send a layover selfie back home, to let everyone know I'm safe."

YONDER...next 347 miles.

"You're never home."

"The prices they charge here, you'd expect them to have an oven not just a gas ring!"

'And that's how to make pancakes.'

"Save yourself — it’s a casserole!"

'If you order...You can digest it in...'

Tuna Salad, Meat Loaf, Cheese Omelet and Bean Soup

Leftovers restaurant - for that unpretentious dining.

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

"Just so I’m understanding the menu, the ‘Old Forge wheel with rosemary-infused pancetta’ is essentially a $36 Hot Pocket?"

"Then add one extra large egg..."

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

"What would you recommend pairing with the school of cod fish?"

'Because we're still part of society - that's why we have to go organic.'

"Great tights!"

"It's my family's special recipe, passed down through generations on the cream cheese package."

"I have a job! I'm an 'I reporter!'"

"It's your ribs. I'm afraid they're delicious."

'After the age of fifty the 'c' word always means colonoscopy.'

'It's one of those trendy 'warm salads,' with sausage, fried eggs, bacon and black pudding.'