Life Of The Survivor Party T-Shirts

'Thanks for not letting cancer define who you are.'

'Do we want to tackle this head on, or just stun it with a glancing blow until next Monday?'

"Yes, I'm sure of my 3 wishes - I wish I had a pen, I wish I had paper to write a 'rescue me' note, and I wish I had a bottle to send it in"

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

'In an effort to make this sales meeting more pleasant, I have taken the liberty of rotating our sales graph counter clockwise a full ninety degrees,'

'Your job description is fairly simple: Stay in your cubicle and try not to make things worse.'

"I've called this meeting so I could see all of you squirm."

"It's hard to manage a staff meeting in a company whose employees all have laser pointers."

"Day 19,918: Once again, Gary cannot believe he's still alive."

Female chemotherapy warrior.

'I'll call you Friday, there's a one in seven chance that's the right day of the week.'

The Department of Lessons Learned...

'Thanks for making it guys. Come on in and pull up a chair.' A square hole in an office floor where chairs can be pulled up from

A castaway on an island with an old TV that's washed ashore, sees two men in an approaching boat marked, 'TV Licensing'.

In and Out tray filled with messages in bottles on a manned desk on a desert Island

Need tickets.

'Before you begin, I'd like to thank you for coming in early to do this on such short notice.'

"I really hate sales meetings"

"Now do you believe me?"

"And now Survivor Six...walking through your kid's room barefoot in the dark..."

"What if I told you that everything you knew about slowly going insane on a desert island was wrong?"

'My new year's resolution is to stay home next new year's eve.'

'Stop! Wait 'til he finishes cleaning my teeth!'

'What do you mean you lost the keys?'

'How did the meeting go?'

'Are you sure this is just a mirage we're crawling through?'

"Yawning is contagious. If he starts, zap him with the laser pointer immediately!"

No Loitering

"Be patient with Ed. You can skip his political harangue in 15 seconds and move right onto sports."

Martin Gray.

"Professor, just how long did you say that evolution thing takes?"

"God it was rough coming into the office this morning after the awards ceremony" "It must have been, you work two doors down"

I survived end of the world after party.

'It just hasn't been my day.'

Snowmen during the Stone Age...