Life Insurance Renewal Pillows

'Uh-oh... that sounds ominous.' - *Knock* *Knock* - 'Am I going to die?!' - 'I don't think so.' - 'Then why are you here?' - 'Your life insurance is due for renewal.'

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

An old man and women are driving along with a 'Still married' sign on their car.

'Following your 'barbecue summer' forecast, I'm revising predictions of your contract being reviewed.'

"Randy the love doctor, what ails you, brother?" "My wife wants us to renew our vows and have a big ceremony." "But I'd rather save that money for retirement. Should I tell her to go take a hike?" "Of course." "That way, there's a good chance you won't have to worry about retirement at all." "Exactly. ...Wait, what do you mean by that?"

"Trust me, darling. It was only a bumper car ride. I promise, it won't affect your no claims bonus."

'Sorry. Your accident insurance doesn't cover that kind of incident.'

'Yes,I do have a question.. What kind of dental plan do you have?'

"John, does this mean you've given up looking for work?"

"With this policy, at the age of 12, he receives 10 marrow bones a month."

"As long as we're renewing our vows anyway, I've come up with a few new ones."

'You don't know how lucky you are. My mortgage is worth more than my house.'

Woman: 'I, Linda...will ALWAYS, A,E,I,O,U.' / Man:'And I, Shaun...will ALWAYS, A,E,I,O,U.'

Medicaid Expansion: "Better not take the risk, you never know when the well's going to run dry..."

"Our marriage has been renewed for another season."

"He's had several billing procedures named after him."

'Try not to smile, sir. Imagine you're looking for a parking space.'

'I feel a lot better! I hacked into your computer and reduced my insurance co-pay.'

"Thank God we're insured"

"Robyn Dixon got remarried!!!"

'There's really no need for confusion with this Medicare stuff. Page 95, section 33, paragraph L in the instructions quite clearly says ... '

'We're going to need a specialist. To help fill in the insurance form.'

'If you wish to retain my rock star client's talents you're going to need to pay a rock star price.'

'The bad news is, during open enrollment we get to choose between our uncaring, inconvenient plan or another one that's just as bad or worse.'

"Those cat nap boxes just appear on their porch every week—it's like magic!"

"Good news, Turner, We've chewed you up but have decided not to spit you out."

'Which is worse - no pre-existing condition coverage. . . or no health insurance?'

'Our insurance company doesn't cover saucer theft if it's left unlocked, so lock it even through this seems like a safe neighborhood.'

"I, Matthew, promise to go along to get along."

"As long as we're renewing our vows, I'd like to trade him in for a newer model."