Library Assistant Pillows

'Well, go and browse somewhere else!'

'You can check out that legal text as soon as the computer lets it go.'

In library

'What's the point of shelving books, they just check them out again anyway!'

Catalogue of little books.

'George was a real central region inter-library loan business unit administration assistant's central region inter-library loan business unit administration assistant.'

'If you must laugh, will you do it in the humour section please?'

'Oh-oh - it's the old good librarian, bad librarian routine.'

Pulp fiction on bookshelf dripping into bucket.

Mountaineering section

Health Book Section

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Are you insane?!" The Velveteen Skunk

'I'll be late for dinner, dear. I'm up to my neck in paperwork.'

'I remember when you used to look for answers using your astute powers of deduction.'

'I'm reading aloud, Jeremy - My lips are SUPPOSED to be moving!'

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

In basket-case.

Copycats

"Too bad about old Ainsworth. Published and published, but perished all the same."

'Peter the Flying Hippo is my favorite storybook character without any merchandising tie-ins.'

"Go ahead and eat her, she's a pain in the a**."

Big Bang Theory.

"Would you like me to annotate that for you?"

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

'Br'er Fox said 'I'm going to throw you into the briar patch'...And Br'er Rabbit said, 'Please,please don't taser me!''

"You're going to hate yourself."

"Bah, I could've written a better dénouement in my sleep."

"Meet The Author"

Books: Novels, Short-Stories, Tall Tales.

Accelerated reading. Slowpoke reading,