Letter To Santa Writer Prints

'Does Santa have skype?. . . I'd like to get in some face time, so he puts me at the top of his list come December. . .'

Santa Claus's Mail

The Apostle Paul receives a reply from the Corinthians.

Thoughts of EWE keep running through my mind.

'Awww, isn't that nice: This one says 'PS: Love to Rudolph!''

Dear folks. Well, you were right; being the prettiest gator of the Everglades hasn't helped me one bit.'

'Of course creative writing is important. You want to write home for money when you go away to college,don't you?'

"I'm like most people, I guess––a mixture of good and bad."

"But if I don't learn handwriting, how will I be able to read Grandma's letters?"

"Hey! I know that handwriting, St Valentines day last year!!!"

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, I am 62 years old and was fired from my job of 22 years just before xmas 2010. What should I do? Sincerely, Irene. Attack! Stop! Enough, Sadie. Haven't you been listening? The mean-spirited, virulent partisanship of talk show hosts must end. People were hurt and some died. Aren't you the ultimate partisan, you coot? That's different lady! Fasten your seatbelts.

Kathleen felt she was stuck between Iraq and a heart place.

'Remember that Op-Ed piece you wrote last month?...'

"We live so far away that the postman posts our mail to us."

Santa's Workshop: Moved to China

"I'm writing to mother to let her know how you're doing.Is deathbed one word or two?"

"Take a letter, any letter"

Reading the love-letter

Letter from Camp* (*with Footnotes)

'It's very public-spirited to write your congressman, Millard, but Joe McCarthy has been dead for years!'

Penfriend

"She'll be riding six white horses when she comes. Stop. She'll be riding six white horses when she comes. Stop. She'll be riding six white horses, she'll be riding six white horses, she'll be riding six white horses when she comes. Stop." "That's just like your mother."

"That angry letter I wrote to the editor came back. She corrected my grammar."

''Return to Sender'...? Dang! - I brought the wrong ENVELOPE!'

Rudolph is at bar speaking to a patron-'So he asks me if I'll pull his sleigh and I'm like-'Not until I get that backpay you owe me fatso!' '

"He thinks it's important to communicate with his plants."

"'Dear Mrs. Zeus?!' The name's Hera!"

Petr Yakovlevich Chaadayev

Actually, I really admire him. He pushes the envelope!

Ask Sadie. Actual questions from actual readers! Dear Sadie, when are you going to spend a few bucks and get a read hairdo? That sorry hairdo you sport makes you look like an exotic parrot. You look like you should be sitting on a pirate's shoulder. - Redheadboy. My initial response might sound like a non sequitor: During the Hoover years, I dated someone in the FBI. I've continued my ties with the agency. I mentioned this insulting @#$% letter to my contact there and: What do you know?! He was

'Not more junk mail!'

Quill

"I've torn up the questionnaire but am using the lovely pen you sent me"

"Hey, got your message. Just wanted to let you know you spelled 'desperately' wrong."

"My grandma writes me letters like that. I call it the Grandma Font."