Legal Drama Watcher Gifts

In a surprising development, Judge Judy today banned cameras from her courtroom.

'We're telling people you have a scheduling conflict.'

OJ Finally Goes Bad.

'Have you ever been arrested? No. I've never been caught .'

Humpty Trumpty

Joan Hickson

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"Not guilty?"

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

'I haven't spent a day in jail since I got rid of my lawyer and hired a spinmeister.'

"Before the defense rests, my client would like to read you a little sonnet he composed about his love for the jury."

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

'Your honor, I'd like a short recess so my client can make a run for it.'

"Another slander suit!"

'Way too much information on your resume.'

'No need to text me the answer to that. I'm right here.'

"Thank you for the rewind, Miss Cooper. Now let us fast-forward to that fateful moment in February and hit the pause button."

'Furthermore, had a handrail been fitted to the wall , my client would not be sitting here now.'

"I'll never understand it. I followed the generally accepted principles of embezzling."

'Do your lawyers have to be here?'

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

'For ever 'no-no' there's a legal 'yes-yes'.'

Say what? Johnnie Cochran died in 2005?

"You don't have to answer that."

'I bet this is going to be another round of criminal bashing, isn't it?'

"In my client's defence, the label on the bottle clearly read, 'rat poison'...not 'people poison'."

"My conclusion that he lied was based on his body language, his polygraph results, and the complete implausibility of his story."

Robert Macaire as a Barrister

'I will not have the species card played in my courtroom, Counselor.'

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde, Esq.