Legal Drama Fan Gifts

'You have been tried and convicted of insider trading. Have you any last tips to offer before I pronounce sentence?'

'It's quite a class-action suit, Sire -- you versus everybody else.'

"Not guilty?"

"Meat cleaver this, meat cleaver that. How am I supposed to get a fair trial if they keep bringing up the meat cleaver?"

'What do you mean, I'm too judgemental?'

"Father, do you mind if my attorney sits in on my confession?"

'That Copier is Out of Order!'

"Isn't it true you were offered a special deal by the prosecutor, in exchange for your testimony?"

'I understand Benson is the principle partner here.'

Pay Cut for QCs: 'I put it to you that this strikes at the very foundations of justice!'

'I blew the whistle on my second employer as soon as I got my second wind.'

'No need to text me the answer to that. I'm right here.'

Forget the chart, we got a real problem, the shredder's broken!

'Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, is this the face of a good dog? No! This is the face of a bad dog! Bad! Bad dog!!'

Man falling over - "Sexual harassment Mr Wiltshire, I'll see you in court."

'Screw up and take out a canine and it's gonna be Subpoena City.'

'I've outsourced the toy-making production and ramped up the legal department.'

"I trust my late husband didn't leave any nasty surprises?"

"Please read back that last remark in a more murdery voice."

"My client is willing to settle. Do you still have the leg?"

"Doesn't it bother you that somewhere down the line we may get indicted or convicted of something?"

3 Ways of Dealing with Conflict

'This is the first time I've ever heard of someone stealing a moped to go on a joyride.'

'Well, that may be the law, Your Honor, but I don't think it should apply to me.'

"Oh my gosh, you're RIGHT! The boundary between our franchise territories is 54th Street! I'm so sorry, guy! My fault entirely!"

Their case having fallen apart, the defense pleads NGBOJWG -- 'not guilty because O.J. wasn't guilty.'

'I'm doing 30 days for fiddling my expenses.'

'Can he call you back? He's being read his Miranda rights!'

'It's a long shot, but we're going to try the 'let bygones be bygones' defense.'

"It doesn't look good. They found your DNA all over the chairs, beds and porridge spoons."

"It was a simple case of mistaken identity. Nobody's fault – I always carry more than one set of ID."

"Honey, you've forgotten your grief case."

"Nothing from the governor, but I did manage to get you a tax extension."

"Look familiar?"

"Remember to watch me from the stand. 'One' is exagerrate, 'Two' is half truth and 'Three' is bald faced lie."