Law Drama Fan Gifts

'After being sequestered in a hotel owned by the defendant, we find him guilty!'

"Don't make me warn you again, monkey. Stay outa the curiosity racket."

"After I graduate middle school, high school and college, I'll go to law school to get you out of this. But I want my retainer now."

First you're a law student, then you're a lawyer, then you're a judge, then you're a politician, then you're a criminal.

"Tax evasion is like a cancer, it's growing exponentially!"

"So, just to be clear: the 'voices inside your head' told you to launder the money from forfeited law enforcement seizures in exchange for federal tax breaks for your Uncle Mark in Costa Rica?"

"Not guilty?"

"The prosecution shall stop referring to the defendant as 'the alleged, totally guilty as sin guy'."

"I'm sorry, sir, but I've got to ask you another question. I heard someone in the courtroom shout out the correct answer."

'Do you expect the jury to believe that? And, more importantly, do you expect the viewers of the eventual TV movie of this trial to believe it?'

'The good news is your life sentence is about over.'

'I haven't spent a day in jail since I got rid of my lawyer and hired a spinmeister.'

"The last time I was in Europe was 4 boyfriends ago..."

"Mr. Pope, please give this summons to your boss. The prosecutor wants to know how god can allow so much misery."

'Way too much information on your resume.'

'No need to text me the answer to that. I'm right here.'

"You think you're gonna whack me and this will be over?"

"I'll never understand it. I followed the generally accepted principles of embezzling."

"Thank you for the rewind, Miss Cooper. Now let us fast-forward to that fateful moment in February and hit the pause button."

Newton's Law and Order.

Mafia Family Life: 'I'm sorry dear - but I had to bring some work home!'

'Looks like the victim was trying to tell us something,'

'Do your lawyers have to be here?'

"Ladies and Gentlemen of the jury, my client blah blah...."

"Apparently we have an informant in our midst."

'For ever 'no-no' there's a legal 'yes-yes'.'

"You don't have to answer that."

"In my client's defence, the label on the bottle clearly read, 'rat poison'...not 'people poison'."

"In a surprising turn of events, the end testifies against the means."

The court freezes my assets and wants me to live on $20K per month? They want me to starve!

'I will not have the species card played in my courtroom, Counselor.'

Law 'N' Order

'He'll be really p****d if he doesn't get nominated for an award this year.'