Lecture Lover Gifts

History repeats itself. Which may explain why it's so boring.

Long Lecture.

"I can't tel you what an honor it is to be the keynote speaker at the Supply Chain management Seminar."

'Your lectures cured my sleep disorder.'

'My class is so large and my seat so far back, I feel like I'm taking a distance-learning course.'

"Any questions?"

Principles of Anaesthesia.

'Welcome. We will start shortly. Please be patient. Our guest speaker has accidentally locked himself in the men's room.'

'I did not expect him to read the whole genome!'

"When do you teach us how to become motivated?"

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

'Could you speak a little louder?'

Professor Buckwheat impressing the agricultural mind

"Welcome to Truancy Prevention 101."

"Yes, Jane Lyons, sitting next to Katy Jones, class of 2018, it is important for a writer to know her audience."

"As this shows, the key of good business strategy is simplicity."

'I tell you what, no more dates with Astronomers! What I thought would be a romantic walk under the stars ended up being a two-hour Physics lecture...'

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

"Not many of you may agree with me..."

'Oh, oh, it's going to be another lecture.'

'Mutation and natural selection? - That sounds awfully STRESSFUL!'

'Today, gentlemen, we will discuss the clostridial diseases.'

TONIGHT: LECTURE BY WISE MAN OF THE EAST, 'Just some retired old Geezer from New Jersey!'

"Next time, don't start the presentation by asking, 'Can you tolerate ambiguity?'!"

"I enjoyed your speech. Although I was sorry to miss my children growing up."

"The competition called you chicken. What are you going to do about it?!"

"Fancy a tutorial lad?"

"To succeed in my class is easy. Keep quiet, pay attention, and let me concentrate on getting tenure."

"Of course he's smiling. He's getting $15,000 to give a lecture on free speech."

Everything You Wanted to Know About Stats ...

In a career limiting move, Reginald decided to give Albert's latest theory some frank and fearless feedback.

That was the last of the Celtic villages. From now on, it's the lecture circuit.

"Don Wood? I don't know any Don Wood!"

"To talk about the 76% of my time preparing lectures, press one. To talk about why adjunct professors teach most of the classes, press two, to talk. . ."

"A haunted house is nothing -- my mum took me to a lecture on the effects of sugar."