Leaf Laugh Lover Pillows

'You took some nice photos of your autumn leaves. Which one is you favourite.'

"... And finally, I’d like to thank the FDA for approving Botox."

A large leaf falling on a dog

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

Snowprov

'How's everyone doing tonight - that is the question.'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

The Last Leaf

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

"Oh, quit your whining. At least yours comes back in the Spring

This is NOT 'nipping out'.

Acme-5000 Lie Detector

"I can tell it's new because it's alive."

Danger Falling Leaves

"Get your polka-dot butt out of my leaves!"

Wind turbine and leaf blower.

"Oh No!! - I'm deciduous..."

'I imagine you'd like to hear about my progress...'

'Your Chef's Surprise, sir -- a sauteed whoopee cushion.'

Please stand by. As stocks soar, our announcer is having a fit of the giggles.

"I eat a totally plant-based diet and I still can't lose weight."

Leaf zone!

'Is there any chance I could do the five years vicariously?'

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

"Pardon us, Harrison, if the board fails to share your enthusiasm for the foliage up in Darien,"

"I think you may have your gown on back to front."

The Houseplant Cemetery.

'Smile and say: tofu-based dairy substitute.'

HM Prison chapel, "try to think of the lord as a 24 hour video surveillance system gathering pictures for the ultimate crimewatch"

'What shall we watch - best security videos of 2013 or operating room bloopers, blunders and bleeps?'

The new fall content.

'Doors opening.' - 'Doors closing.' - 'Doors bored now.'

"You were ho-ho-hoing in your sleep again!"

"Target in range. Ready... hug."