Leadership Coaches Gifts

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"Looks like we found the issue."

'I hope you're not threatened by powerful women, because you're fired.'

"Remember the golden rule: more buzzwords, less real words."

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

I like the Jets...I guess

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

Others will fight for you

'For your information, I am engaging the energy of change and complexity to create the future I desire.'

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

Business books - Who's Who & Who's Downsized sections.

How leaders fail

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

Work/Life Balance

"Why won't you teach us how to handle complaints?"

'Very impressive educational background...now let's discuss WHO you know.!

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

'I clawed my way to the top and then I clawed my way back to the middle.'

Surfing the daily stress

"Any questions?"

"I hate performance review season."

"I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's more likely to be followed than following."

Shoulda, Woulda, Coulda

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

'When I was young, I said I'd make it big or know the reason why - Well, I sure know the reason why!'

'Your decade of experience is, unfortunately, from the wrong decade.'

Self-esteem room

"So what makes you think you're qualified for this job?"

"Actually, it's more like a mouse race."

'Your resume is impressive, but next time try to shorten it from 100 pages to one.'

'Perkins, we're getting rid of some of the dead wood around here.'