Lazy Aficionado Pillows

'It took months of training but now she'd rather sip a martini than fetch a ball.'

Risks for the heart patient Unloading the Dishwasher "Sorry? No can do." Answering the Land Line R-R-RING! R-R-R-RING! N-nope R-R-RING!!! Doing Taxes "Doc said I should take it easy." Any Car-Related Errand "The old ticker."

"I just got home. Let me roost a bit."

"Doc, I think I'm suffering from insomnia...every ten minutes the boss bursts into my office and wakes me up!"

"This is nice … let’s not hop again tomorrow."

'He lives for his holidays.'

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

"C'mon, you can do this! Be the sock!"

Cat medal presentations take a long time

"Today let's work on changing channels, drinking with a mouthful of food, and yelling at the TV all at the same time."

'No, I am not finished with the comics section, now give me back my glasses!'

Man and woman on donkeys at the beach

"This is the way I like it - I pretend to be asleep and he doesn't bother me."

Fetch the Boomerang

'Dad, is this like ... you doing your own thing?'

"I kicked the idea of mowing the lawn into the long grass."

"I'm sort of hesitant to remind him that his work-from-home days are over starting Monday."

Labradoodle/Labradon't-le

"It's the naps you don't take that you regret the most."

"I'm too lazy to chase cars. Thanks to phones, I now just track them."

"Read me back the minutes from the last dip."

Do it yourself - Get someone else to do it

'Ideally, I'd like a job where my multi-application cell phone will do all the work.'

'Someone told him life begins at forty. Now he's reserving his energies!'

"It's our best seller. Perfect for sitting idly by."

'Inactive wear'

'OK, my dinner's in the oven. Where's the oven?'

Sleeping Chair.

"I think I'll sleep in tonight!"

'I don't think that lifting the remote control counts as exercise!'

"Fetch? You fetch it - you're nearer to it than I am."

"I'm not sure where Larry stands on the issues but I sure know where he sits!"

'This isn't his nap. This is his pre-nap. Then comes his nap. Followed by his post-nap.'

Laundry baskets labelled 'pajamas' and 'not pajamas'.

'Believe me, you don't know how lucky you are to be able to work at home.'