Lawn Liberationist Gifts

No Mow May

'Homelessness does have its advantages - I haven't mowed a lawn for five years.'

"He's declared it an area of natural beauty"

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

'Congratulations! Our yard's been declared a national wilderness area!'

"Can you cut the grass but leave the daisies?"

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

Beginning Yarder.

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'I fought the lawn and the lawn won.'

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

Believe it or not, I'm sitting her watching the fights. Harry versus the crabgrass, the moles, the insects...

Beware of the Lawn

The Scottish Lawn

"Sometimes Bob just needs a little motivation to get things done around here!"

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

September: All the familiar signs of harvest are with us once more.

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

"This lawnmower is a real time saver. After pushing it around for an hour, I forget about all the ambitious landscaping plans I thought up over winter."

Keystone XL

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

Garden sprinkler in the form of a classical statue

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

Man mowing lawn that grows quicker then he can cut it!

"We're out of bags."

Human males marking territory.

Lawrence of Suburbia

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'