Lawn Decor Devotee T-Shirts

"Maybe we should cut back on those lawn catalogues."

'Behold. Ed and Jim have finally reached nirvana.'

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

The Fall of Gnome

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".

Beginning Yarder.

'He misses his garden when he's on holiday'

"The gods seem angrier than usual today."

'George! This way quick!'

Goddess of Fertility garden feature

'I'm finding the greens a bit slow.'

"Basically, I'm looking for a beer can holder with a mower built around it."

'I can't get my husband to water the lawn.'

Beware of the Lawn

"You did order the chemical-free insecticide."

'Al's Lawn Care Service: There's no crabgrass too crabby for us!'

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

Flower lamp.

'I'm making one of the craters into a birdbath.'

'If I've calculated correctly, I have two more birthdays before I never have to mow the lawn again.'

"This one will go with everything,

'Fred's opinion of crab grass is if you can't beat it, join it.'

'Despite her numerous advanced degrees, Dr.Bessie couldn't keep her mouth from watering.'

'The grass is always greener on the other side seed'.

"I've found the lawnmower!"

'...so I said to Linda, 'I can't do yard work in the rain!''

"It doesn't mean you, Hickford!"

'You know it's too hot to use the sprinkler when the spray turns to steam.'

God builds the first lawn mower.

'That's what I call a boomerang sale. His wife takes one look and back it comes.'

'Be sure to bring home your divots so you can patch the bare spots in our lawn.'

Mower Repair