Law Enforcer's Companion Pillows

'As it's your first day we're going to start you on something easy.'

Next camera crew 5 mins

"Do you know why I pulled you over? Do you? Do you? Yes, you do."

"You're under arrest for breaking the law of gravity! You have the right to..."

'Can I have your autograph...?'

'This is a phone poll! Are you in favor of a ban to drive and use a cell phone at the same time?'

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."

Life in the Fast Lane.

"Tell me about your fear of policemen."

It's amazing how people slow down when you point a hair dryer at them.

'I hate frisking magicians!'

"Yeah, well, you sure don't drive like a slow loris."

"I've only had eighteen pints and can drive perfectly well osifer...why don't you go and arrest some real criminals?!"

"My people will get back to your people."

Early Profiling

"I'm giving you a fine for illegal parking. I don't care if this is a traffic jam."

I've heard of on-line banking, but I think this may be the first ever attempt at an armed, on-line bank robbery!"

'Call for back-up.'

"Very well done, Samuels. But next time, don't forget your handcuffs."

Just doing my bit towards breaking up the banks...

'It's for my glaucoma.'

'I'm sorry, Mum. But, if I let you off, I'll have to let everyone's mum off.'

'...A vehicle clocked at more than 1,800 miles per hour!'

"Do I get the reward if I hand myself in..?"

'I'm sorry, Catherine, but my feelings for you have changed since you reported me for stealing cable.'

Policeman receiving an award of a truncheon

"Confound it! "Shoot first and ask questions later" doesn't apply to the interrogation room!"

Boy caught by a policeman

'Police Navidad!'

No Parking.

Drunk police officer

"You're my top enforcer, Donahue, but I have to let you go. The word on the street is cultural appropriation."

Crime Review - 'And here's one of us celebrating a bank heist.'

'If you give up the right to remain silent, you get to keep all bragging rights.'