Law Enforcement Humor Gifts

Piñata police line-up.

'...if you don't stop..er..singing Mr Bieber I'll arrest you for possessing an offensive weapon as well as drunk driving.'

Stun-gun target practice.

'Pull it over, Speedy.'

"May I speak freely?"

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

"You have to let me make my own mistakes."

Projection

"The big one dropped his weapon, but keep an eye on the little one. I think he's still armed."

"Ahhh! Ha-ha! Exactly what I said when I was pulled over. Dipstick!"

"I realise that you're trying to impress your new employers on your first day, dear. But, this is our car!"

Sweet Jailbreak

For the last time, officer, I'm absolutely, positively sure it was number four.

One lobster has another in hand cuffs.

Messing Up My Metrics

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'Let this guy go. He's working under cover.'

Rollercoaster police chase.

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

It slowly became apparent that the police interpretive dance artist was less effective than the police sketch artist.

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

Oh, sorry, I didn

'This is just a routine check, sir -- are you a turtle?'

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

'Number three. Definitely number three.'

"Good job, inspector! Today you made the suspect dance and tomorrow you'll make him sing!"

"OK, since you have a medical card the cat nip is legal, but I'm going to be watching you."

Hair Spray / CS Gas.

Police Warning - Flash photography can seriously damage your driving licence.

"You were doing 10 knots over the limit."

'I ran a computer check on you. If you'll give me the phone number of that cute babe Diane on your MySpace site, I'll let you off with just a warning.'

"Avon calling..!"

Christmas Police

"You have the right to remain silent – but, it would be helpful to know what you think."

Police car bumper sticker: 'Honk if you want a traffic ticket'.