Law Enforcement Appreciation Pillows

'You're under arrest for pretending to beat up a mime'

Police Feline Unit

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

Billy. The Kid.

'He just burst into my campsite, and broke my banjo!'

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

"This is a neighbourhood vigilante area."

Meanwhile, in Florida: Little Free Library/Little Free Firearms

'I'm lost, did you happen to see a lady without a boy like me ?'

Never tell the boss "You can count on me" during inventory.

Totalitarian Humour

This is the last time I ask Peterson to dust for prints.

"Our therapist couple be so proud of us now."

"Careful! He knows computers."

"I knew we'd eventually catch him. He can't run and run as fast as he once did."

"Another reckless baby driver! I'd arrest the whole lot of them if they weren't so damn cute."

"OK, we may not have ways of making you talk, but we do have ways of making your leg twitch uncontrollably."

'I think it has reached critical mass.'

'When I grow up I want to join the SWAT team!'

'I hate frisking magicians!'

'It may well be nesting J.T but damn it, you've got a company to turn.'

Mobsters at the Beach

Racial Profiling

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

Old West Bounty Hunter.

'He spoke his first words today Serge - 'ello. . . ello. . . ello'!'

Family traits.

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go, Richter. The crime rate has dropped.'

"I said freeze, punk, I didn't mean literally!"

Scars and Bars

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

'I thought forty is the new thirty.'

The fierce urgency of now - and how to avoid it.

"911, what is your major malfunction?"

"He's an ex-police dog, so he's very law abiding."