Law And Order Elf Pillows

"So, Mr. Claus, there IS a Virginia!"

"My problem is a recessive gene for honesty and a dominant gene for robbery."

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

'Mrs Witch, you're being accused of using a poisoned apple to send a young girl into a death-like sleep. I'm placing you under arrest for the possession of illegal drugs.'

'Why is it always about me?'

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

Privatized Jails

Newton's Law and Order.

Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Policeman giving paramedics a fine.

'Sorry...you're not quite right for the position.'

"No offence Jon, but..."

'I think we both know that's a decoy.'

'Dr. McWit, I'm going to have to cite you for violating the laws of gravity.'

'With all the new laws being proposed, our tomatoes with founder genes may soon be an endangered species.'

'Vice squad - you're busted.'

Santa's Workshop: Moved to China

"Well, when you were called a 'bad dog,' were you publicly harmed?"

'We struck these tax laws, but they somehow spontaneously regenerated into line 501(c), section 746-e, subsection (3), as described in paragraph (2).'

"I want to report a race crime.'

Driving Mr. Qcrazy

'And what if I did doctor the documents? I'm a doctor.'

'Are you sure this is all you can remember seeing after you were attacked?'

"We're all metric now..."

"If you can prove my innocence to the court, I'll give you half of my cut, from the bank job."

"You're not allowed to enter the city. Your exhaust emissions are much too high!"

'A Policeman hey? My dad is a crime-fighter too: He's a Forensic Accountant...'

"Where were you five minutes ago when someone was stealing my getaway car?"