Laundry Experimenter Gifts

"Drunk, yet orderly"

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

'Caw blimey!'

"It's our latest scent...Dryer Sheet."

"This is your new solar powered dryer?"

Help! (Woman stuck on washing line).

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Santa's wash day.

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'

"And do you, Scott, take Amy, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, through mysterious separations of indefinite duration, as long as you both may live?"

"What can you do with him?"

"Yes, they come out white than white, but when they went in they were blue."

'Sorting the laundry is hell.'

"Did I hear you use the phrase 'Earn my keep'?"

"Why do I always gain socks in the wash?" "In a Parallel Universe"

"I'm making him take a spin class."

"You realize one of us is not coming back."

Heavy-duty, super-capacity, two speeds, 10 cycles. All of them vicious.

'I distinctly remember saying 'No Starch'.'

"We've done it! We've done it! We've discovered a detergent that takes the chore out of washing and makes all other detergents seem old-fashioned by comparison!"

"Walking down here and asking if I can get you some more detergent from the store is just the beginning of my fence-mending agenda."

Giraffe holding up the washing line.

How it started: How it's going

'And who told you to give the Holy Shroud a good wash?'

"Nice try Kevin, but you've put all your laundry into the dishwasher!"