Laughing At Life's Mishaps Pillows

'Well sure, YOU'VE got brakes on FOUR wheels!'

'I hope you haven't been picking at it.'

"I need to tinkle."

Missing my hair.

Lilly was too far from the phone to complain about her new stairlift.

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

"At least she got it to squeak when she tripped over it."

'Wow! Where'd you come from?'

'My 'harrumphs' are losing their volume.'

Emotional Incontinence - Emotional Illiteracy

'Your extensive anxiety condition was brought about by worrying about a national health plan.'

'I'll have to reschedule your appointment -- the doctor had an attack of squeamishness.'

'Oh dear.'

Bad sea-legs

"When water turns into ice, which of its physical properties increases?"

"So you turned off the power, huh?"

'These shooting sticks are not very comfortable!'

"You get a great view of the ball park from here."

"And so now I'm supposed to be the faithful companion who goes for help?"

Frog gets the Fly. Ouch

General Dentistry.

"Are you sure this is what the man who attacked you looked like?"

"The most painful thing about the breakup was the tattoo removal."

New Graduate: Entering real life.

'Was that you who screamed?' - 'No, the dentist.'

REcalculating...