Laughing At Layoffs Pillows

'See, I told you - nobody's job is safe!'

Very Difficult Conversations

"You're a great team player - so we're trading you."

"I see by your resume that you're having trouble finding work because you pad your resume."

"When I said, 'I want you to sleep on it'. I menat when you go home tonight."

Looks like another profit's warning

'It's my own fault. I never upgraded my skills. I was replaced by a man half my age with a more advanced smartphone and hundreds of productive apps.'

41 Rounds of Layoffs Survived

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

"He used to be a senior fact checker at Meta — now he's just a pedant."

'There's new evidence that my departure from my previous employer merely coincided with their brain drain.'

You're Employment has been terminated -Smiley face lol

'I'm afraid we have to let you go. As you know, you're entitled to a 'Golden Handshake'...

"The good news is that I'm still here after the boss cut our department by 33 percent."

"You're the only one in this department who has survived the staff cuts. I can only advise you to do your job well, otherwise I'll have to fire you too, got that?"

What Bob thought outside the box.

'We really can't afford golden parachutes any more, but here's a plastic crash helmet.'

"They told me my parachute would be golden. Turns out it's pyrite."

'OK everyone get out... we're downsizing!'

"Maybe we should've done layoffs after the holiday party."

'Relax, I'm not here for you. Just for your job.'

'Ere Bert, what do I do with a lady who wants an each way bet on the boat race?'

'I'm afraid we're going to have to let you go.'

"But I was told this was included in my severance package."

"Don't forget to torch the place when you leave."

"I'm not good at confrontation, so unscramble this phrase in your head for a surprise message."

The Impractical Guide to Having Babies: 'I'm the one with his head in a pelvic vice!'

'Sorry, Tantor -- we're downsizing.'

"What makes you think there are going to be layoffs."

"That's life in the corporate world. Yesterday I was the company's 'go-to' guy, and today, I'm the 'you go too,' guy!"

Boss leads employee away to fire him.

'The destiny of untrained seals'

'My boss said they might be laying off more people next week...what wine goes best with panic?'

"By the way - My own last day is Friday."