Large Animal Practitioner Pillows

'Oh! So you're a large animal practitioner. We'll, you're going to LOVE this!'

"...and what really makes this story scary is the kittens got lost in the woods before flea and tick products were invented."

'Hi, Doc! I don't think I'm going to need you after all....'

"I have your gender reveal results. Boy, girl, boy, boy, girl, girl, boy, girl, boy, boy..."

"Congratulations! It's a bitch!"

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

'I gotta admit it doc. . . My wife was right, a little time on the couch and I already feel better.'

'I guess you might call it a sort of penicillin reaction.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

"Rescue someone; rescue yourself"

'I wonder how long he's been a vet?'

'Animal Psychiatrist' (a dog).

An inbred poodle.

'Ta dum deedee dum -- DUM -- Bloop -- Fsst, tra la,,,'

"Would you say the pain is more like a me-ow or a me-ouch?"

Committee On Feline Healthcare

"I'm sensing that the role-playing homework I gave you didn't work."

'I'm sure he thinks he's a parrot!'

"Good news—it's not colon cancer, it's tinsel."

'I don't think the Doctor will be able to see any more patients today!'

'Worst case of Prickly-Heat I've ever seen!'

'Now tell me about your puppyhood.'

'His jaw got stuck when he tried to fetch the Sunday paper!'

"He's so old I usually let him do what he wants."

"May I keep my collar on?"

Balding dog

'Relax, you are in doggy heaven. I'm just from a temp service.'

'I had my vet put down. He was over 23!'

Veterinary Clinic. No, it's not a "wading" room.

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

"In my practice, I prefer to treat the whole hog."

'Look, when you made an appointment for me to treat a rattlesnake bite,...

'The increasing popularity of the Saint Bernard...'

'Bless you!'

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'